Recollections

That's right, it's another quote entry no one asked for. I recalled a whole load of quotes that I hadn't used previously, none of them were from me but I may slip some personal gems in there. I seem to be gradually getting into a better mood lately. Perhaps me and my boyfriend are finally seeming to connect again, perhaps it's that new shampoo which makes my hair smell really nice, perhaps it's the bottle of wine I drank for no apparent reason other than it was £1.99 and tasted like vinegar water, perhaps it's because I'm going home tomorrow to see my mother and I will drink a whole load more wine and regret saying and doing things which my family will thankfully forget and never speak of again. Who knows. Perhaps I truly am just a zombie*.

Here's the thing: If you ever got me, you wouldn't have a clue what to do with me. (1)

It's not so pleasant and it's not so conventional. It sure as hell ain't normal but we deal, we deal. (2)

Girls are supposed to dance. That's why god gave them parts that jiggle.(3)

To be forgotten is worse than death. (4)

The things I do for love. (5)

 But you know what’s left? Love. All I feel for you now is love. Nothing else. (6)

I'm running away with you, that's all I ever do. Let's leave it all behind, help me back, to my mind. (7)

Nobody knows you, and nobody gives a damn either way. (8)

During your first time, if the guy says to you at any point, 'Please let me do you up the arse because my girlfriend won't let me.' You know something has gone horribly wrong. (9) 

We want the finest wines available to humanity. And we want them here, and we want them now! (10)

Urgh, where did that bottle of wine go... Why are my eyes stinging... Oh right... It's been the longest day I've had in ages. Calling quits until I think of more. Ah yes the empty bottle of wine has wriggled down to my ankles on bed... I should put that somewhere safe. Off home tomorrow to regret visiting my parents, getting drunk and watching Saturday night television after meal at the restaurant time forgot next to the beach I spent my youth gazing at whimsically. Will stumble into Uncle's bed and breakfast after crawling out of home, make enough noise to warrant being chastised in the morning for disturbing guests, will scarf down sausage sammich in ill thought out pyjamas, will then spend hour telling my aunt about all the things I daren't tell my mother.... If anyone in the universe knows the whole story they will be hunted down and silenced. I mean the whole story of my life of course. Happy days.

(1) So, funny story, this is a quote from Maxine in Being John Malkovich (it's entrenched in the top 5 of my favourite films ever). It was also a line I used the days I was single and ready to mingle at the bars. I think the term used to describe me would be a bar fly. I'd let a guy chat me up, I'd pout and banter until he bought me a drink, then there would be the inevitable come on. I would smile and place my hand on his shoulder, I would say this line and nine times out of ten the guy would accept I wasn't interested and move on to the next girl with the garish make up and tiny skirt... Them were the days... In the rare instance it would cause a man to be even more clingy I would down the drink and leave the club/bar without a second thought and disappear.

(2) Boo Panic at the Disco you say? Well boo you! Their first album, although experimental in essence was beyond amazing. I don't care... Unfortunately their second album destroyed my faith in their creativity and direction as a band (as most second albums tend to do...) and I lost my interest in them. So this song is about lead lyricist Ryan Ross contending with his father's alcoholism, go figure, it's pretty intense. Can't say my family was as dysfunctional with it's hospital visits but we were vicious. My sister and I didn't realise how wrong it was until a therapist told us otherwise. It's the saddest day of your life when you realise your parents aren't infallible, when you discover they are as fragile and as lost as you are. It's heartbreaking when you realise you can't help them, no matter how hard you try. So this song helped me through some teenage dark days, hardcore, I know.

|(3) Not so much a best quote line but an anecdote initiator. Thank you Troy Barnes from Community, the best TV show ever for pointing out something hilarious and truthful - I am aware the picture is actually from Troy's extremely well thought out crab joke, I just love his beautiful face. I told the people at my volunteer job I was a professional dancer (utter bullshit), I may have elaborated further to claim I was in a production of the Nutcracker when I was 16, back then I could get my leg over the head, oh yeah I could do it now, I just need to stretch and be at the right angle. No one flinches at my continuous double entendres, hence my persistence and continued elaborate lies in order to get a chortle out of someone. No I'm not Clara, she's blonde, are you crazy? Sugar Plum Fairy? More like Sugar Bum... Do I look like a fat arse to you? Surprisingly I haven't had any liquid courage to come out with these lines, everyone is just really forgiving or forgetful at that place...

(4) Poor Freya Crescent, no one likes you. Well I sure as hell don't. Poor Freya, a relatively ignored character from my favourite Final Fantasy of the franchise FFIX. That game has carved such a special place in my heart that it will forever remain there never to be replaced, I know it more intimately than anything I've known, it's my favourite game. Unfortunately the best quote, the most truthful, the most memorable, my favourite quote, comes from a virtual non-entity after disc 1... Shame. Awesome quote, beautiful game.

(5) The things I would do for Jaime Lannister...

(6) As with most sane people I wasn't a great big fan of season 4 of Skins, I think I mentioned it on this blog in fact. I love the rest of it, even that ill advised 3rd generation which no one particularly liked but me, I watched it all rapt with awe and a curled lip of disbelief as I ranted about songs appearing which shouldn't have in certain episodes. But here it is, the quote from Skins I remember the most and that sticks out so strongly. Go figure, season 4 had something good, it's adorable and heartfelt.

(7) You're on a train, you're trying to convey something. You're sitting next to someone you love, you've fled your life, coming back from somewhere you'd never been, you want to convey how much they mean to you, what it all was for. You convinced them the best thing to do was just run, to just escape instead of face the problems at hand, you talked in a different city, you pretended for one day to forget it all, you were happy, what you always wanted to be. You play this song, it conveys all you wanted to say without saying anything. They understood, nothing more was said. You return to reality, your whole self aches to run again.

(8) I'll Believe in Anything is originally by Wolf Parade but I have two covers by Sunset Rubdown and Her Space Holiday also on my iTunes. It's an awesome song regardless of who sings it, I'll take any, they are all awesome. Brilliant song and a quote that also soothes on those lonely days. The original is the best, although I could change my mind again...

(9) My personal attempt at imparting wisdom. I went home this weekend, spoke to my cousin, she is more interested in talking about sex now she is a gnarly teenager, she wanted to know about my first time. In a moment of familial affection I decided to be completely honest with her and use the story of my first time as a cautionary tale. It ended up being condensed into one bitesize quote. If she loses her virginity in a manner which is less awkward and rubbish than mine then I'll consider my job done. Hopefully she won't let me down.

(10) Withnail. Richard E. Grant, one of the best characters in a film, an alcoholic, narcissistic unemployed actor. His first role in a film, and this from a man who is a complete teetotaller, amazing! It's such a good film and it's use of Hamlet quotes also please me. The whole holiday in the Lakes never ceases to amuse me, and Uncle Monty! So of course nothing beats Richard E Grant flouncing into a cafe and demanding alcohols for his parched throat. 

*A guy at work calls me a zombie. It's because I walk around with a dazed expression on my face I assume. It's just how my face relaxes... At my previous job a girl told me in a much nicer manner 'You're just really hard to read.' Hence why no one bothered and I remained on the shelf among the other autobiographies no one has any interest in.

Quotes

These are just a selection of quotes I really, really like. I've been told most of them are morose. I don't care, there they are. Oh and because I miss university and the hassle of writing things with extensive footnotes (oh the days of footnotes...) I decided to footnote this entry. The links will show you where the quote is from, the footnote elaborates. 'The rest is silence.'*

'Reason tells me that you and I are unlikely to meet again, but I think I shall not listen to reason. I have seen the world inside your head and know that all things are possible.'1

'Nothing of me is original. I am the combined effort of everybody I've ever known.'2

'We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars, but we won't. We're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off.'3

'Be not afeard; the isle is full of noises,
Sounds, and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears; and sometime voices
That, if I then had waked after long sleep,
Will make me sleep again; and then in dreaming,
The clouds methought would open, and show riches
Ready to drop upon me, that when I waked
I cried to dream again.'4

'I'm going to drag you down with me
I'll take you walking by the sea
And when I find a place to rest
I'll hold your head upon my chest
and I'm, going to drag you down with me.'5

'Spend your pity elsewhere. If you are so set on running hadn't you best be off. Fool of a pirate.' 6

'I prefer being someone else, when I'm myself I always make a mess of things'7

'Each morning it is her face that replaces the darkness.
In me she has drowned a young girl, and in me an old woman
Rises toward her day after day, like a terrible fish.'8

'If I have pretended until now to know my characters’ minds and innermost thoughts, it is because I am writing in (just as I have assumed some of the vocabulary and ‘voice’ of) a convention universally accepted at the time of my story: that the novelist stands next to God. He may not know it all, yet he tries to pretend that he does.'9

'Whatever doesn't work out always make a good story after.' 10

'You don't tell me things, Joel. I'm an open book. I tell you everything, every damn, embarrassing thing.' 11

'I'm done with all this thinking.' 12

(1) - Doctor Who - Girl in the Fireplace, Jeanne Antoinette Poisson, Marquise de Pompadour, favourite episode of the first four season of 'Nu Who'. I'm an Eccleston/Smith lover, Ten-hater. I won't lie, I get a lump in my throat every time I watch this episode.
(2) - Invisible Monsters - Chuck Palahniuk - his best book in my humblest of opinions, probably tied with Diary but that one is largely disregarded. A lot of quotes from IM resonate with me, this one in particular has been a quote oft said when inebriated and among people I'm trying to impress.
(3) - Fight Club - Chuck Palahniuk - just one of those Brad Pitt quotes he simply delivered in the movie, amazing, always stuck in my head. That YouTube video makes me ache to watch Fight Club again... and again. Don't argue that there are a zillion better Fight Club quotes, I know, I like this one!
(4) -  The Tempest - Act 2, Scene 3, Caliban. My favourite speech from ye olde Shakespeare, filled me with wonder as a young one, twangling is possibly my favourite word ever. Shame Danny Boyle also liked it too and shoe-horned it into the Olympics Opening Ceremony... Fine Kenneth Brannagh quoting it was... Mind-meltingly good but still, I've been having a personal love affair with this quote for years...
(5) - False Alarm - Cherry Ghost, Cherry Ghost are a largely ignored band, I ignored them too, but this song was one of my most listened to for a while and the only song I kept from their album 'Thirst for Romance.' I wouldn't wish my terrible music taste on anyone though.
(6) -  Cidolfus Demen Bunansa - FFXII, his dying words to his son Balthier, proof that FFXIII was an incredible step down from the majesty of FFXII. No more needs to be said.
(7) - Haha, that's a quote from me! Thought I'd slip it in there. I always fuck things up when I'm myself, friendships, job interviews, university, conversations... As long I am playing a part, AKA that of a happy carefree person I can fool everyone into thinking I'm worth their time. It's when they see the vulnerable paranoid lonely idiot underneath people run and leave me lonelier than ever. I'm better off sitting in coffee shops reading alone and observing people, I learn more that way.
(8) - Mirror - Sylvia Plath - It's just a poem that resonates and yet it hurts, I have a strong belief poetry is best evoking a feeling, this one makes me feel so many, specifically the end, specifically despair.
(9) - The French Lieutenant's Woman (p97) - John Fowles - Not content with creating my favourite literary heroine, Fowles also decided to use this particular novel to meditate on the control of an author over his own particular universe and characters. He goes as far to implant himself in the story as a wizened bearded chap and observes his characters as he decides their fate. It's not the most succinct quote but it's an amazing bit of literature right there.
(10) - Ha gotcha, that's another one of mine. It's something I live by. If things don't work out they'll either worm their way into my memoirs (never to be written) or it'll make a funny story. Like all those times I tripped and fell flat on my face... Or said some awkward and everyone stared... So many good stories..
(11) - Clementine - Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind - Props to Charlie Kaufman for writing my favourite film ever. Screw romance, this is love. I'm always paranoid I let people in too fast, when I care I tell a person everything, intimacy is about sharing things. It's important to feel wanted, vital, needed, it's rare.
(12) - Going Fishing - The Phoenix Foundation - From the Eagle VS Shark OST. I love Taika Waititi! I'll forgive him for directing the US Inbetweeners in exchange for being from New Zealand and directing two brilliant films (Boy and Eagle VS Shark) and helping out with Flight of the Conchords. Ok so the song you ask? It fucking cheers me up, it's sure as hell no comforting sounds but that simple quote becomes my mantra when I'm losing the will to live. It's a cheerful song! It's lovely! What more does one need?

* For the eagle eyed or remotely interested, the little quote at the top is the final words of Hamlet. I just stuck it in there because it felt right, but I would be remiss if I didn't cite it. Love Hamlet.